airrogance:

how do people cheat i cant even find one person to kiss me let alone two


deadpon-and-weible:

impsexual:

Because telling fat people that they are in fact humans that deserve dignity and respect automatically means you’re ~*GLORIFYING OBESITY*~

By the way, don’t dribble on to me saying you worry about a fat person’s ‘health’. That’s just a bullshit excuse to voice your unwanted opinion on a fat person’s body considering you wouldn’t give a single flying fuckadoodle about someone’s health if they were skinny. Besides another person’s health is none of your damned business anyway. Run along now and preach to a choir that actually cares.

I’m going to be honest, so long as you’re not hurting anyone, you can eat soy sauce and milk duds all day long for all I care.

thank you so much for this comic imp.

lordjaysus: sallynopants: One night President Obama and his wife Michelle decided to do something out of routine and go for a casual dinner at a restaurant that wasn’t too luxurious. When they were seated, the owner of the restaurant asked the President’s Secret Service if he could please speak to the First Lady in private. They obliged and Michelle had a conversation with the owner. Following this conversation President Obama asked Michelle, “Why was he so interested in talking to you?” She mentioned that in her teenage years, he had been madly in love with her. President Obama then said, “So if you had married him, you would now be the owner of this lovely restaurant,” to which Michelle responded, “No. If I had married him, he would now be the President.” get it girl z snap

lordjaysus:

sallynopants:

One night President Obama and his wife Michelle decided to do something out of routine and go for a casual dinner at a restaurant that wasn’t too luxurious. When they were seated, the owner of the restaurant asked the President’s Secret Service if he could please speak to the First Lady in private. They obliged and Michelle had a conversation with the owner. Following this conversation President Obama asked Michelle, “Why was he so interested in talking to you?” She mentioned that in her teenage years, he had been madly in love with her. President Obama then said, “So if you had married him, you would now be the owner of this lovely restaurant,” to which Michelle responded, “No. If I had married him, he would now be the President.”

get it girl

z snap


my mother said i could be anything i wanted so i became an anxious and antisocial recluse with an internet dependence and an intolerance for natural light


Rizzo, your sass is showing



joichang:

riddlemetom:

unfollower:

I like how sweden just decided one day that gender is fucking bullshit so they got a gender neutral pronoun and stopped separating boy clothes and girl clothes and have pictures of spiderman pushing a baby stroller in a toy magazine why isn’t every country like sweden

you push that stroller sassy spiderman!

image

you fight those bad guys girlfriend!

image

you style that hair lil’ dude!

image

and in that moment, i swear we all wanted to be fucking swedish.





You are as precious to me as you were to your own mother and father.



onlyinafigurativesense:

I HAVE LITERALLY BEEN WAITING FOR THIS GIFSET MY WHOLE LIFE



potterheadwhoviangleek:

shubbabang:

Soap operas are so ridiculous

“She’s cheating on you and I kidnapped your mom and you think your brother killed her but your brother isn’t really your brother because he was switched at birth but your real brother is the guy that your wife is having an affair with and I’m your long lost child you never knew about. Also your father came back from the dead and we don’t know how.”

Kind of sounds like Doctor Who.

#Ha!